This is for all of you CEO's out there - if we ever get one to read this. We know you are just SO sad of us, working the night away. Those poor guys, you say. "Buy them something to eat", they say to the Creative Director. "Hey, Pizza is great!".
No. We want beer. We want cigarrettes. And when you deliver them to us, we want you to leave and let us work in peace until we are done.
It is impossible to work with you guys waiting for us to finish. Impossible. We have the deadline on us. We know we won't sleep until you approve, so we are working our sweet butts off for you to be so impressed - or dead tired that you won't give a rat's ass - so we can finish this shit off and go to bed.
I have a winner of a story. It always pisses me off, but that one made me learn big time. Once, we had a big presentation. it was on Monday. So, we came in Friday. Saturday. Sunday. All done. Never got to enjoy the weekend. Never got to see our boyfriends, girlfriends, wifes or vegetables. Just stayed in like it was a hurricane and worked. So Monday comes... and oh my God, funny as it seems, the presentation suddenly changes to Wednesday.
It was a lie. it was a trick so all creatives would stay and finish the presentation, because they thought we would not finish. Did you ever see The Shining? Felt like Nicholson there for a while that day.
So yeah. Come, give us your brief. Get the hell out. Don't call us, we'll call you.