There is an I in leaving

Who am I kidding? Sleep? My body doesn't want to, and hanging myself... I don't have enough rope. Shit. Oh well...

We had an interesting comment in one of our posts recently (Hi Ero and Lucy!) about being scared of leaving an ad agency. I feel your pain. Let's help a "sista" out, shall we?

Leaving an ad agency is difficult. Most of all, when you have been there for a long time. It is totally normal that you get accustomed to your surroundings, your co workers, even your boss. It's like a marriage, I swear. Divorce can sometimes be impossible to think of - and most people don't realize how easy it really is, when you are determined to JUST BEING HAPPY.

Back to my point... You feel that it's better to stay with someone who knows you but makes your life miserable than just leaving and giving yourself the opportunity of being truly happy somewhere else. Then, you probably might think that your wife or husband has no possibility of making it on their own - in this case, you might think that you are needed at your ad agency.

Not so.

Fact. Many people can do what you do at the ad agency. Fact. If you are feeling stuck, you will forever feel this way. Only this can change if your boss makes you part of the process. Fact. We all have two legs, two hands and a bag. If some people can pack up and leave, you can do it too. Fact. By switching jobs you WILL make more money. Fact. All ad agencies suck, you just have to play the game and find what works for you.

I recommend the following: go out on interviews. Get your name out there. Resumes usually don't work. Talking to people worked for me, at least. Screw it if you are afraid that your boss finds out - it means business. It means that you are not happy. Again, like a marriage. Leave, or tell them that you are leaving. If they truly want you, they will not let you go. (Well sometimes wives or husbands are such psychos that they won't let you leave, but that is another story, for another totally different blog)

Going out on interviews lets you see, right there and then, that some people are interested in what you do. You get a fresh opinion on what you really mean and do. If they want you, if they want you on their team, it means that you are doing something right. It is also an ego booster. You feel like a new person. Also, you can compare with the truth right in your face: where you work there is no possibility of learning more or having much exposure. At this other agency, there might be a chance that they get you more involved. Good!

Worried that your portfolio sucks? Have you seen other people's ads? Most of them suck! We ALL have pieces in our book that we are ashamed of! Doesn't mean that you don't have a body of work! Just show what you can do. If they don't like it, screw them. There are millions of ad agencies out there. You have a good chance of hitting the lotto.

Worried that you will move to an ever shittier ad agency? That you will be working even more late? Hm. This one you can smell out. Talk to your friends. Talk to other people in other agencies. Get the real info. You'll be surprised of how much dirty crap you can dig out. This helps when looking for a new job.

Gordon Gekko was right. Greed is good. Greed works. You are human. As a person, you will want to grow, to do more. To earn more! If you are responsible, hard working, there is a job for you out there.

Here ended the lesson.

I will conquer my Insomnia tonight

This is it. I'm done. I'm going to sleep tonight, I don't care if I have to hang myself in the process. But, before I go sleepy time, I wanted to give you a nice reminder that you have something due tomorrow: NOTHING.

Remember, tomorrow is WAS day. No working at any hour. Step away from the jobs. Don't answer the telephone. No adaptations, no logos. At least try to do the least amount of work possible.

I'm counting on you...

PS: Included is a nice photo example of what you could do.

PS Part Deux: Are you still afraid of your boss? How can it be possible that no one dares to write a post for us? Come out of that chicken shit shell and vent! You'll be glad you did.

Name that post!

No whammies, no whammies... Hey! Can you notice I can't sleep - AGAIN? Oh well.

I was thinking of how much stuff we have written. Great angry posts about all that we (and you) could think of. I sometimes browse thru months ago, just to laugh my ass off.

Um. Have you read all our blog? What do you like best so far? Come on, let's do a cool survey on which posts really rocked your world. Besides the fact that it is cool when people comment in our blog - so we don't feel so lonely - it would be interesting to see what do you think about what we write, or what really got you. You can put as many posts as you want, just try to keep it short. Hey! If you liked all our posts - you are the best human being in the world. We love you. Marry us. Have our children.

The the post with the most will get... I don't know... a round of beers for the angry writer.

So... Name that post!

And then, God created Mr T

I love Mr T. I wish he would pity me. Anyway, here is the link to Top 30 Mr T Facts. It's not that long as Norris' list, but it's sure funny. Has some award winners like:

• Mr T defines love as the reluctance to murder. If you're still alive, it's because Mr T loves you.

• Mr. T once pitied a fool so hard that he burst into flames.

• Mr. T's umbilical cord was actually a large gold chain... the medallion didn't grow in until he was 6 months old.

Enjoy!

By the way, click at the photo and you get a cool Mr T Wallpaper, courtesy of the guys at Backgroundmania. Do us a favor, join in the fun and take a picture of your mac with the wallpaper on it. We'll post your desk as soon as we get it!

Too Funny!

We borrowed this from getamused.com. This is soooooo poignant for us ad folks, so, what the hell. It's their idea, their copy. (Am I being a Copycat?) Jeez...

SIGNS YOU NEED A VACATION:

1) Your accumulated vacation hours let you retire 10 years early.

2) The radiation from your monitor has burnt your shadow onto the wall

3) Wife has more and older children than you can account for.

4) You've gone from decaf to espresso to straight gin.

5) Wastebasket in your office is full of the ripped-off faces of people who came to you with a question or problem...

6) You get on the down elevator on floor six, push the sixth floor button and become irritated that you are not going anywhere.

7) Your kids call 911 and report a burglary when you come home at early one night (8pm). They didn't recognize you ...first time you have been home before their bedtime in months.

8) You look at the clock...it shows 6:00...you can't remember if it's AM or PM.

9) The janitor vacuums you in the evenings

10) The little leprechaun, that only you can see, who keeps telling you to, "Burn it, burn it all."

11) You spend too much time in front of the microwave before noticing it's not your TV.

12) You've begun to enjoy the elevator music.

13) Acne at age 43.

14) You begin to explore the possibility of setting up an I.V. drip of espresso.

15) What shall I do today? Pretend to work ...take a hostage ... pretend to work ...take a hostage ...

16) Whenever your boss asks how the project you've been working on 14 hours a day, 6 days a week, is coming along, you laugh uncontrollably for 3 minutes, then break into a medley of show tunes.

17) Tylenol stock takes a nasty drop every time you take a weekend off.

18) A growing need to DO something about the guy in the next cube. You know, the one that makes all those annoying sounds and smells. Yeah, something...something permanent. Yeah...

19) Spend day staring at the squirrels on the front lawn of the building. (There aren't any squirrels at your building. There's not even a lawn).

20) WAS ORIGINAL!!! - Instead of dreaming of going somewhere for three months like Katmandu or some strange cool far away place, you love to come into work, just to read our blog.

PS: The photo? Venice, Italy. Would you rather be there? Gotcha. Again.

Fact: Some deadlines are bullshit

OOOh if I could only bet money on this one...

Ever wondered why, all of the sudden, out of the blue, you get one or two jobs that are for tomorrow? How can it be, you may ask yourself, that this bozo needs ALL this work in less than a week or less? You take a look at what you have to do: three print ads, two radio spots, maybe 3 tv spots as well. Oh, remember to do the ads full page, half page and black and white.

Something stinks in here. It's the bullshit deadline.

Your client cannot possibly put out that many pieces in such a rush. Hey, maybe it happens, but trust me, not that often. What you might be dealing with is a fake deadline, so you hussle and the agency doesn't look bad. Even worse - maybe, Oh Lord, the Account Executive sat on his ass for a few days and... OOOps, I did it again: I forgot to open a job. Fucker.

I usually check the deadlines very well, but I have the luxury of calling up my clients - shh, don't tell - and checking each one of them to see what's the rush all about. You know what? Half of the time, they have no problem with switching some jobs for a day or so later. But say that to your garden variety account exec and you get a song and dance about how the client SPECIFICALLY asked for all that stuff for yesterday. Of course, he's your buddy, he can't be screwing with you. Yeah, and pigs fly.

My advice to you, pissed off creatives of the world, is simple: get to know your client. Hang out with them outside the office. Go have some nice BBQ ribs or something. Hey, you get to meet new friends - who then can possibly become your clients, how else do you think people give their accounts to ad agencies? - and you get the inside truth and what is really going on with your jobs.

If not... your acccount exec will corn hole your ass... forever.

JLo's People Have Rights

Seems that some people didn't get to enjoy the Super Bowl ads... The infamy! Well, have no fear, WAS is here.

So, here's for you guys down under at the Caribbean, here's the link to all the superbowl commercials.

Orale!

What's so super about the Super Bowl?

I'll make this short and sweet: I am not a football fan, but I do enjoy getting together once a year with old friends, fresh beer and hot wings for an evening of hanging out and acting hyper macho in front of a super-sized TV screen. As an ex-advertising person, the Super Bowl is important because it is also the showcase for new commercials. Some are good, some are great, others are weird, and some are even expensively crappy.

Nevertheless, Super Bowl ads are about at important as the game itself… except where I live. For the first time this year, our local cable provider decided to sell the available spots to local advertisers, therefore eliminating our chances of seeing the super ads. While the rest of the world saw the goods during the commercial breaks, our local market was treated to the same crappy six ads that we’ve been seeing for the past 18 months. Man was I pissed off!!!

The situation at hand made me realize two things: 1.) The Super Bowl isn’t so super when the commercials are cut out. 2.) Our local ads are REALLY CRAPPY. I can’t believe people stay up for hours creating such shitty ads. I mean, if you’re going to limit the commercial breaks to the local market, at least produce some cool spots just for the big game, like other advertisers do. So, because I have been let down by my local industry, I’m going to break an “unwritten rule” here at WAS and I will name names: Screw you Medalla Light. Screw you even harder, Coors Light. Also, I’d like to stick an 18” dildo up the ass of everyone involved in those sappy public service spots. Screw you, Pedro Davila, who’s voice is featured in four out of every five commercials. And especially, screw you OneLink and WPRU.

Would you rather be here?

Monday has come. The Super Bowl ads? Gone. The Beer? Look in your trash cans. The chips? Half way thru your intestines. Reality has come, it's Monday. Again.

So... Let's start the week off with a low blow. A kick in the balls or ovaries: Times Square, Manhattan. New York City, baby. (Click at the photo and you'll get a better view)

If it was up to me, I would be staying at the Portland Square hotel (it's right next to Tkts, and cheap as hell), drinking a cool Orangina at Soho... Wasting some time at Chinatown. Looking at the MoMa's Odilon Redon for hours at end... Having some dinner at Planet Hollywood... Drinking Starbucks at Trump Tower...

I sure miss my last weekend at NYC. If life had rewind... Dammit.

Everybody hated high school: Battle Royale

A warning: this review is about a movie that is drop dead gory. I mean... really bloody. If you are not into Japanese movies, just click close on your browser. This post is not for you.

This. Movie. ROCKS.

Welcome everybody, to the strange and demented world of high school. Try to remember your high school tales. All the different groups, the people that loved each other, the people that hated each other... The gossip. The teachers. The nerds. The jocks. The cool girls. The timid chicks. And, most of all... try to remember field trips. This last one is very important. Battle Royale is definitively, the field trip to hell.

This is the basic premise of the movie: society has changed a bit, and suddenly young people are a bit rebellious. They are not going to school. They don't behave or listen to grown ups. And, in a weird Japan way kind of life, the government has decided to deal with this issue in a... very strange way.

Take a whole class of troublemakers. Throw them on an Island. Give them weapons. They have three days to kill each other, until only one survives. The last kid goes home. That's it. What the fuck?, you might think. They cannot possibly kill each other! Um. Yes, they can. They will.

Hey, um, guys? This is a movie, ok? Not reality. So let's just play along and not go into a huge debate about violence in schools or young people. We are talking about fiction, so bear with me.

Anyway. This is not a kung fu deal, not by any means. This is just violence. But in a weird way, it's not your average gory movie. For example, Halloween is violent but in a useless way. It has no plot, no meaning. Battle Royale does.

I remember high school like a big soap opera. It had all the copy points of a great drama. I kind of liked mine, hey, but it was set in the 80's, the greatest years of all time. Great music and awful clothes surrounded us. But trust me, if I suddenly lived in Bizarro World and was given a weapon... I don't know if I was the first to say, hey, let's not fight at all. I would be like... Hm. I have to survive in order to get home, so... First on my list, skinny chicks who made my life miserable and wanted to steal my loving boyfriend. Where's the ammo, dammit?

People carry grudges, specially high school ones. And this is a well known fact. How many people do you see that buy expensive sports cars, get plastic surgery and botox or lose massive amounts of weight just to walk into their 10 or 15 year reunion? Lots. You want to look your best and want to give the impression that you are the king of the world when you get there. That, my friend, is a grudge.

For some strange reasons, most of all distribution rights and the fact that this violence is acted out by "teenagers" (they must be on 11th or 12th grade), the movie is very difficult to get. I guess they think that suddenly kids will start playing this game or something, I don't know. I bought my copy at Hot Topic, you can try there or any artsy fartsy art or comic store.

So. Are you at your video store and all that you can find is dog poo like Must Love Dogs? Try Battle Royale instead.

A great idea: Why Advertising Sucks Day!

We have lots of readers... avid adsuckians who come each day to our blog of anger, seeking truth and wisdom from some pissed off people. So I was thinking... why don't we all just screw working next Wednesday?

Here's the plan, you tell me if you are in it or not.

On February 8th, it's WAS day. You basically go to work, like any other day. Sit at your desk. Take all the jobs out and just look at them. Then, proceed to give a rat's ass about the deadline. Take a day on us. Download some stupid games, music, whatever. Listen to your iTunes music all day. Chit chat with your nearest creative. Play poker. Take a two hour lunch. Whatever, just don't work.

Why, you must be thinking, do we say this? Guys, COME ON. Think about it. We all work out butts off. Monday thru Friday, we're there, frying our brains out. Then Saturday and Sunday comes, and we are all doing things that we should do on the week: go to the bank, do the laundry, clean our houses, go to a doctor's appointment that we should have scheduled months ago but couldn't because of some stupid client... whatever. We all try to catch up with our lives on the weekend. When the hell do we take time for ourselves???

Well, well! That's where WAS comes in to help. We think YOUR BOSSES should pay for your time off, because YOU deserve it. You need to take some time off to let your brain mellow out for a while. Hey! It's not for sabotage! No way! By taking some time off, you get more creative. You take a mini vacation from your life. Trust me, come Thursday you will be more relaxed.

So... if any of you guys out there are doing this - I AM! - then please, post what you are doing while WAS day. We want hourly posts, to see if you made it.

PEOPLE OF THE AD WORLD UNITE!

PS: And by the way, if you haven't done it... Will you vote for us? Thanks.

It's Friday, time to: Climax!

Ce-le-brate good times, come on! Ta nah na nah, ta, nah, naaaaaaaaah.... Ceeee-le-brate good times, come on! Friday is here! Your boss sucks! Mine too! Time to leave early and go have a drink and bitch about this week's ads! Here's a nice drink to ask for at your nearest bar: the Climax.

Ingredients:
1/2 oz Amaretto
1/2 oz white Creme de Cacao
1/2 oz Triple sec
1/2 oz Vodka
1/2 oz Creme de Banane
1 oz Light cream

Mixing instructions:
Shake all ingredients well with cracked ice, strain into a chilled cocktail glass, and serve.

Do you go both ways?

Gotcha. Again. Not what you were thinking, hot shot.

I was asking if you are a double threat: a creative that can both design and write, or viceversa. I think that this is the way to go right now. A good creative is supposed to be great at both. You should be capable of coming up with a great copy and an impressive design. Not exactly at the same time, but you should try to do both, if you can.

I recently had a chat with a cool cat that was telling me how he was starting to meddle in design programs so that he could learn to do changes and stuff. Perfect thinking. I started out by writing. But, in time, I discovered that if you took the time to learn the basics, you could be a better creative. And hey, you could get paid more than your average joe.

Think of all the time you can help your team mate if you helped out by doing copy revisions or even a design change. Dude! Hours! Days! There have been times I have been doing design stuff while my partner moves on to more difficult stuff. That makes us more efficient! He does the same. Sometimes, if I'm dead tired and can't possibly come up with just a header, I'll take the art adaptations while he dives in to work a new concept for another job. We both can knock out major job counts in a matter of days, and do them well at the same time.

It also helps if you both can handle each other's stuff. For example. Take... vomiting. It happens, right? Ok. So you are a copy and I'm a designer. One Friday I decide to stay at home to puke my brains out and you have to go and do a presentation. Your client starts arguing some stupid thing about design. You should be able to fight back, to argue your way out of there. If you only know copy, but you don't know jack about design, you are in deep trouble. Same applies to me. If you have unfriendly diarrhea and I have to explain why this header is better than our client's, I have to know something about copy to make my point right.

So! You a copy? Start up your mac. Get some programs. I don't care how, but get them. Start doodling around. Move stuff. Take some ads home. Try to do adaptations. Try even doing some couple of ads just by yourself. Oh, you're a designer? Install Word on your mac. Get some copy points and a watch. Write something. Start with radio, work your way up with a tv ad, and then a print ad. Think up a great idea for a mailer.

You will get surprised at how much you can actually can do.

Don't have a clue? Sit down next to your design dude or your copy dudette (or viceversa). Look at what they are doing. Learn where are the commands, where to move stuff. Read their copy. Try to understand how they write stuff. We all have the same brain, so it is way possible you can learn how to do this.

Trust me. Going both ways is a good thing. Hi Martha Stewart!

We're all in the Creatives Studio!

Ok... It's the Actor's Studio, but for this week, we won't care. I've always loved that program - at least when they had good actors coming in (don't get me started on why I don't think Queen Latifah or Martin Lawrence should be sitting there). My all time favorite is Robin Williams' appearance (extremely cool as hell illustration borrowed from Time Magazine). I mean, come on! How is it possible that this man thinks that fast? Jeez.

Inside the Actors Studio is great material, I think, for ad people. At least for me, it gives me ideas on how to write people better. I know, those are just 30 second spots... but still, it gives me tools on writing, using different approaches to a same concept and even in shootings, where people shut down and can't deliver. Just by hearing the pros you can pick up on some clues on how to make your job easier. Think about it!

Anyway. I decided that for tomorrow (no one writes this late anyways), you will be the ones that fill up the blog. We want you to participate! Here's the deal. Here is James Lipton's guest questionnaire, in the exact same order as he asks it. It's your job to post your answer so that we get to know each other better... I'll post my answers as a comment so you can read them clean without my personal bullshit. Have fun!

01. What is your favorite word?

02. What is your least favorite word?

03. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?

04. What turns you off?

05. What is your favorite curse word?

06. What sound or noise do you love?

07. What sound or noise do you hate?

08. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

09. What profession would you not like to do?

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

I didn’t hear no Bell !!... cuz I was knocked the fuck out..

Overworking is just something that comes naturally to me I guess. Working 12 hours only to get home and work an additional 5 hours. And if anything’s for sure, I’m not the only one. I lost count of just how many people in advertising keep these grueling work schedules and still pretend to be fresh the whole week. It’s just not possible but people’s specific situations, shows that to a certain extent, we are forced to slave away to the wee hours of the night to get the extra cash we need to make ends meet.

Think about it: how many people do you know who freelance on the side doing x or y activity, often sacrificing leisure and rest time in exchange for an extra buck? It gets you thinking if all of this is really worth it in the end. Doing shit jobs to later be forced into becoming a shylock or loan shark so people will pay up. Not fun. So let me get this straight, long work hours so your company sees you committed + long home work hours to make ends meet + loan sharking days upon end = success + peace of mind. Hardly.

If anything I’ve noticed that a person just can’t live off freelancing. The pay is a major hassle and you can’t help but feel almost dirty knowing how much you had to whore yourself, just to get those extra few hundred bucks. But alas, this is a reality. I live it, maybe you live it, but in the end… is it really worth it? This is a question we often ask ourselves… and it just begs to rephrase the question to a series of questions: Is it really worth it to do something we say we love when it is so harmful? Are we too afraid to see if we can make it elsewhere in another industry? Is success the way to happiness or happiness the road to a different type of success? Definitely food for thought. All the best.