Oct 23, 2007

Two and a half years.

This is the amount of time I haven't had a decent vacation. Yeah, I've taken two or three days (working days, that is) but... longer than that? Nah. One of the things that no one tells you when you start up your own business is the hard fact that for quite a while, you can't abandon your job. You have to give it your all. So, I've done that.

Why am I writing? I AM GOING AWAY ON VACATION! We cannot be more happier. A whole week at Las Vegas. Yeah, Me is going away and she's going to do some nasty shit while she's gone. What will she do? A couple of interesting things come to mind:

1) Drink a lot of alcohol. Tequila, mostly. This can cause some adverse reactions, I know. I am not responsible for anything that happens.

2) Buy a friend of mine a dirty lapdance from a really blonde and stupid tramp. Hey, I keep my promises.

3) Spend a huge amount of money playing stri... I mean... Poker.

4) Do the Helicopter-Dinner thing at the Canyon. A promise is a promise!!! (Yikes, I hope I don't get vertigo or some weird shit happen while on the air)

5) Go to see Tony Bennet, Cirque du Soleil, the Vegoose Festival. Scream my lungs out when Public Enemy appears.

6) Call my mother from a payphone. Tell her I got married. Hang up. Laugh for about an hour. Call back. Tell her I am not kidding. Call back in an hour. Tell her I was kidding. Call back again. Tell her I was kidding about kidding.

7) Do something that I won't regret and that cannot be photographed or videotaped.

If you have any other ideas for Me to do while she's off doing something that will stay at Las Vegas, the nastier the better, by all means, write back.

Well guys, off I go. Be nice, be tender, live long... and prosper.


Burst said...

Absolutely nothing nasty about this one... but... if you've never had the pleasure of seeing Tony Bennett live, you MUST do whatever you can to get to a show while you're in town. The man is ridiculously great, an incredible showman and downright inspiring human being.

I wept a few times, no kidding.

As for the nasty... at the Bellagio they love it when you sweat profusely at the table games. Well, really, any of the 'classy' joints like that sort of thing. Leave some sweat stains on the felt for the next big winner and you're guaranteed some comps. You can use it to clean up after the tableside bbq ribs (another highrollers favorite).

Eugen Suman said...

1 and a half years here :) but i'm getting a week off next month, hopefully.

RestrictionsApply said...

We went to Vegas three years ago and it was AWESOME!!!
Make sure to do the following:
- Play poker at the Bellagio and at the Rio
- Hit the Vodoo Lounge at the Rio
- Have dinner at the Hard Rock Casino, and ask for the Lucky 7 special (it's not on the menu, and girl, you won't regret it!!!)

Have a nice trip!

Me said...

The Lucky 7... Interesting. Food or drink related?

Tony will be a must. Sentimental reasons.

Keep the ideas coming!!!

joker said...

Well you asked for it... Joker's top 10 things for Me to do in Vegas... and no, punches will not be pulled.

10. Kiss Tony Bennett on the cheek (starting sweet)
9. Watch Cirque do Soleil's Zoomanity and flash your titty to the hottest guy you see. If anything else happens be sure to use protection :D
8. Go to the Grand Canyon with a stop watch and hock a loogie
7. Go to one disgusting all you can eat buffet and punish your digestive system.
6. have a camera handy and do a body shot on a girl, take pictures of all the guys staring and shifting their weiner and put them up on WAS
5. Shout obscenities in the grand canyon and try and record the echo (I dunno wanted a real random one)
4. Eat spare ribs and if a hot guy looks at you say that you're sorry but you just love sucking on bone lol.
3. Go to Benny Hana's
2. Buy a random hot guy a drink and say, "I'm not a hooker, but I can treat you like one."
1. Videotape someone giving you head and calling you Me'stress

have a hell of an awesome vacation luv. Cheers and don't do anything I wouldn't do.... drunk. :D

Peace, love and maki rolls

Zi joker

Me said...

Thanks dude. I'll come back pregnant and with a broken lip. Yey!

joker said...

Pregnant no, but do make sure to practice a lot. lol. Just hope you have a kick ass time.

Me said...

Oh, dude. I can promise my ass on that one. I will have the best time of my life, starting the second I close the door of the office.

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