1. Why do I use hand sanitizer if I can eat food heated in the disgusting microwave at my office?
2. Headphones keep the evil voices out of my head.
3. If I doodle while you’re talking to me, you still have my full attention. I promise. Really. Now what were you saying?
4. I wish I had a time machine to ask myself in three days about all the great ideas I didn’t come up with for a campaign on its due date.
5. Paper cuts are Nature’s small revenge.
6. If you copy/paste a brief from last year don’t bitch if you get the same executions.
7. Learn to write correctly in your jobs and maybe I’ll take you seriously. Maybe.
8. Have you ever met someone like the ads you make?
9. Everyone has something on their play list you can make fun of.
10. Fluorescent lights are my kryptonite.
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