Feb 20, 2008

HELLO WORLD!


A funny thing happened on my way to the WAS page counter. I usually try to keep track on how many visitors we get, hoping that some day we break the readership records. It's important to us, you see, because we honestly want more people to share our anger and hate... Hey, Darth Vader did it, why can't us, right?

EEEEh... OOOOOh... I can feeeeeel your aaaaanger...

Anyway. So I click my way thru the ad clicker thing and... wtf? 500 readers in one day? WTF? Did Joker post something way nasty? (A little bit of insight: when the JayJay rips a new one to a specific group of people in the biz, we get high numbers, yey!) Well, I decided to try Technorati, which is a blog that tells us who is linking our material across the world...

And what do I find??? (Insert here idiotic Oscar music, picture Me dressed as Sally Field on Crack) Why, you like us! You really like us! No guys, honestly, I didn't have a clue, and it will be a great surprise to my lovely bunch of writers, that most of you actually link our posts to your blogs, and sometimes write great reviews of our work!!!!!!! Fuck yeah!

Of course, my pride and joy is to know that Joker has a strong fan base - hey, who doesn't like reading about anal shit going into CEO's asses? - and many, many, many of you (Police Academy reference, thank you very much) love to spread his angry seed all over the net. I would like him to know that even his reviews about boxing have made it to some other blogs, many people find us by googling us... wow dudes, it makes me very happy to report this.

So! Hey, I'm so glad you are enjoying this! Now, please, do me a favor. Do us a favor. We are trying to increase our numbers. If you have a friend who hasn't read our foul posts, please, just send them our URL. Wanna do something really balsy? Send the link to your boss. Ok, I know it's going to get you fired. Ok, so when you quit your job, send him the URL as a fuck you note. Just send someone our URL... please!!!

We want to become the PerezHilton of Advertising Blogs. If we ever get those numbers... Damn, I will actually achieve some advertising here, make dough enough for us to make our damn book - WAS 2005-2008... and even have some extra cash to:

1) Buy Joker and Ms Joker a bar in Bora Bora, where they can retire from this shit, make loads of angry and cute babies for me to baby sit and spoil;

2) Buy RestrictionsApply a one night only Prince concert;

3) Buy TravisFckr all the damn Star Wars shit he can fit into his apartment, signed of course by George Lucas himself;

4) Buy myself a nice sicilian hunk that will do somethings so nasty even my grandpa will be ashamed of me. Ok. I'm bullshitting. I just want to buy me a nice apartment right near the ocean. Awwww...

Our promise is still hanging tough: we will not write about cool ads because we have to, idiotic marketing news... we don't want to go there. If you need to know what Ogilvy is thinking from the grave, this is not your blog. The day that we actually care... ugh. We joined the Jim Jones bunch and drank the Cool Aid. This blog would have no meaning whatsoever.

No way man! We hate what we do, we wish to retire from this shit on a daily basis, we rant about our bullshit clients, we know we will never, ever cure cancer or do something meaningful from advertising, we will still daydream about having our bosses have their asses munched off by a toothless hooker... and we'll write about it. A lot. And when we're cool, we'll still tell you which movies suck ass, which tv programs are decent enough to watch, which CD's to stea... I mean buy... You get the drill.

So thank you for all your links, keep the reading going, this week is going nowhere and we are bitter, so many awful posts to come. I promise.

Love you guys!!!

8 comments:

TexanInHippieland said...

ME... I must say, that was a rather shocking post from you. Normally, I find Joker includes the more, shall I say, "colorful" adjectives.

Just want you to know that I have indeed told many of my friends about your site. It's one of the best, to be sure. Congrats on the 500 a day milestone!

I hope you all get very rich and can someday leave the soul-sucking abyss of moronic clients and ass-sucking account teams. I will SO come to Bora Bora and be the bar's "Norm."

(Is weed legal in Bora Bora?)

Daniel @ Burst said...

Absolutely... congrats are in order!

One of things I've always liked about you guys was your (apparent) lack of self-awareness regarding your utter galactic magnitude. There goes another fantasy down the shitter.

Thinking In Vain said...

How awesome... :)

And of course, mission accepted. ;)

Me said...

Dan: I don't think we're all that... Did my writing sound that way? Honestly, I was so damn happy yesterday, I decided to celebrate. Sorry if I over did it...

Tex: Dude... track back to 2006... I'm writing waaaaay nicer now... But still, you should see me when I drink... Eeesh.

Vain: Yeyyyy, send, send!!!

joker said...

I'm just glad the hate isn't spent in vain.

Ben - thanks for the kudos. Though I doubt the Bora-bora thing, weird things like the lottery happen so who knows. But I truly hope to be able to do something a bit more satisfying than what I've been going through this past week.

Dan- No worries I'm firmly in the shitter and above all else this blog is therapy. Utter galactic magnitude aside, still hope you enjoy the reads.

Tiv: You've helped cheer me up quite a few times these past couple of weeks so triple thanks dear.

me- you and My Madame Joker have been the two things keeping me quasi sane this week. Without y'all I'd do a Brandis so thanks for the info, didn't know people enjoyed my bitch fits that much and hope to keep bitter enough to stay entertaining.

Cheers

joker said...

Oh, and I don't know if Bora-Bora has legalized weed but I'll be sure to find some good Indo Haze for ya.

Thinking In Vain said...

Aw yay! I love cheering people up. :) Too bad I can't get a job doing that.

Make the logo bigger said...

So much bitterness, so little time.

;-p

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