Jul 1, 2008

SeNotu #2: Say no to Facebook Applications

Have you ever wanted to send free gifts? Have you ever wanted to send a kiss, a hug or various other bodily love expressions? Have you ever wanted to send a zombie bite, a ninja star, a mafia star, a guerilla grenade, a flying monkey, pink cancer ribbons, red aids ribbons, dance dance revolution clases and or a drama chipmunk? That and much more await you if you not only signed up to Facebook but clicked accept on each of the 38,000 applications available at our beloved social network (also known as the stalker arcade).

The worst part is that I get these hundreds of invitations by people who have the tenacity and balls to call themselves my friends. 10 million requests and not one simple message, wall post or picture comment.

WHAT

THE

FUCK

?


Worst of all is that applications have this gremlin like stance in life where they replicate with the greatest of ease and merely promote the decay of a website that isn’t half bad since I don’t have to put up with the bullshit animations and profile backgrounds ever so present in your new virus nation, Myspace. I can honestly say I haven’t closed that fucking profile because of two people who I don’t have on Facebook.

But wait, what is this? Ten messages in my inbox? Yayyy!! I matter, someone gave a shit and sent me a…. drink…… and a gift…. And a group invite….. and a video… and ah for Christ sakes. Send me something with meat that I can get my teeth into. If you dare send an emoticon or a gift of a Christmas ham so help me god I’ll shove your keyboard up your arse.

Honestly though, why do people want to be in contact only to not be in contact. Why do I get a drink, a candy bar, an edible thong and a fortune cookie and not one message from the ghost friends that populate my fucking profile. Seems like it’s time to clean my profile, but wait…. Everyone will find out who I deleted and start asking stupid questions, like why did I erase Ivana and not accept their mobwar. To these people I say only one thing…. Don’t be surprised when you find a head of a horse gently tucked next to you in bed.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

OHHHHHH god I feel your pain on this one. I was only having 30 fits the other night about the same thing. I had to sign up to that shower of shit to view 2 friends photographs they've taken while travelling and I hate it, I hate that my friends are associated with FakeFuck and I hate that they've made me associate with it by putting their stuff on it. Call me bitter and snobby, I don't care!
I am going to put something on my blog about this now - got it last night and thought it was rather funny.

Anonymous said...

lol..... i think myspace is better...

Kristan said...

I'm with ya again! And I don't even know you. But I assure you, if we were Facebook friends, you would not get any of that sh*t from me. Only messages, PAID gifts, and an occasional poke. Because I'm awesome like that.

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