Aug 8, 2008

Flaccid Penis

I use this headline to kick off this post because, oftentimes, that’s the end result of the advertising process: what started off as a promising endeavor, with much excitement and high expectations of a mind-blowing experience, delivers nothing more than a deep sigh and much frustration. It’s like expecting a Ferrari for Christmas and getting a Hyundai instead.

I blame my dad for making me realize the truth. He once asked me the following: “How is it that you, as an advertising professional, spend so much time, energy, sleepless nights, lost weekends, arguments and fights with your coworkers, countless mind-numbing meetings, tolerate idiotic changes, and actually compromise with people who have shit for brains, just to come up with a 30ss ad? How is it that it takes over two months to do this? After all, when your ad finally goes on the air, there’s a 98% I’ll change the channel. And if you’re doing print, there’s a 99.9% chance I’ll flip right by it and use it to line my bird’s cage.”

Of course, his observations totally pissed me off, and I tried to defend the creative and artistic merit behind the process. I tried to defend the economic process behind it all, the business of advertising, and what it means. He wasn’t buying it. He simply said: “It’s not worth it. Your time can be better spent enjoying and living your life, not bending backwards to make someone else money.”

On a more graphic level, the advertising process is like sex: you’ve waited weeks, maybe even months, to get your girl’s panties off… and tonight’s the night. You’ve put in a lot of time and effort for this, you’ve had to put up with a bunch of bullshit, but tonight you’re gonna tap that. There you are, stroking your rock hard inches, only to have your bro go soft when she wants it most.

Like T.S. Eliot once wrote, “The world ends not with a bang, but a whimper”. So do the ads we create.


Stan Lee said...

A world weary copywriter once told me that behind every crap ad was once a great concept. Not sure I completely agree, but I'm sure there's some truth in it.

shaun. said...

"but tonight you’re gonna tap that."


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