Oct 21, 2008

M. Night Shyamalan owes me money.

A couple of years ago I saw The Sixth Sense. I was surprised because for as long as I can remember, not one movie scared the shit out of me since The Shining. As it ended, I thought... this M Night dude has some talent. I will see every damn movie he does from now on. Hm. Let me go movie by movie that I actually watched so you can understand why I am demanding my money back.

Unbreakable: This was my cup of tea. First of all, Bruce Willis. Check. Comic Book Heroes, check. Interesting plot, check. I enjoyed it very much - not ooooh aaaaah I loved it, but still, one of my favorites of him in that years.

Signs: Aliens? Well, ok. Tension, check. Sort of nice acting by Mel Gibson and Joaquin Phoenix, check - it could have been better in many departments. My thoughts at that time: maybe the studio fucked some things over, like any other client, and he gave in. Not in my favorites, but still, I can catch the rerun at TBS.

The Village: My brain is going WHAT THE FUCK when I am at the theater watching this turd. I didn't even hate it, I laughed so hard at how much it sucked... and I was not alone. I can remember the few times I over heard people talking smack about how bad it was, and this was no exception. I vowed never again to watch another film from him unless people told me it was cool. So you can understand when Lady in the Water came, I just did my nails and skipped it completely.

Now, let's go forward in time to June. I was celebrating my birthday at NYC and I stopped at my favorite Comic Book Store, Forbidden Planet. As I asked for the guys at the counter to find me a special toy, I heard the cashier giving his review about The Happening. He was kind of... pissed. So I asked him, does it suck? Um... kind of. Here comes in my brain saying: remember this guy. Don't watch it.

Cut to yesterday night. There is nothing to watch on the TV and my TiVo is already empty. I decide to see what is available on my cable service On Demand shit. Hey, there is the movie. Should we watch it? Um... well, we don't know much about it beside that it may suck. Do we give it a try? Um, yeah.

I want my motherfucking money back. What is The Happening? A movie where NOTHING happens. What a waste of time and more importantly, my money. Either M. Night Shyamalan has lost his touch or... nah, he lost it. This was crap on film, period. Bad acting, bad music, bad everything. Stupid plot, stupid everything. I will not even explain what happens.

The problem is simple. M. Night Shyamalan is trying to stretch the "twist ending" movie franchise way too much. Instead of trying to make a decent movie, he insists on twisting everything. And the thing is, the majority of them twist to pure shit. The Happening is, by the way, the last, last, LAST movie I am watching done by this man. Why? Let me put it this way.

A wise man said once: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.


Anonymous said...

Why did this make me seriously consider renting this film tonight?

Joker said...

Reverse psychology. It works every time.

Me said...

They say curiosity killed the cat. Or at least, made it waste some good money.

RestrictionsApply said...

Let's not even get into "Lady in the Water"...
This dude should've stopped after "Unbreakable"... even his cameo on "Entourage" was crap.

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