Sep 2, 2009

Divine 69 - Part 3 of 7 #'s 49 to 40

And the juvenile list of fictitious women that spurred me on continues. Remember, the requisites are simple. These women can't exist, always refer to the comic or cartoon version and truly show that men are dogs and will ogle at anything with appealing curves. Enjoy the pubescense.

Coming in to the third chunk of this 7 part list, here we have the 40's starting with...

49. Elektra - Dare Devil Comics

If you like girls who sigh, look elsewhere. If however, you love a vixen that can wield a sai better than any miracle blade, Elektra is the woman for you. Greek in descent, it's no wonder she looks like Aphrodite and kills like Aries. There's a saying that love is blind, but hell, even Dare Devil had to recognize Elektra was smoking hot. So by all means, appease this goddess or don't come bitching about getting multiple stab wounds.

48. Witchblade Women

Take your pick out of all of the Witchblade wielders and they're guaranteed to be able to make your jaw hit the floor, out of sheer reaction to their beauty or just because they sliced it off. Witchblade is one of those series that isn't life changing but does promise to offer boys of all ages enough eye candy to cause a sugar spike. Deadly, beautiful and scantily clad... all ingredients to push sales and inspire midnight trouser hauntings.

47. Gadget - Rescue Rangers

You gotta love a gal who's good with a tool. Gadget is one of those geeky, smart, grease monkeys that can't help but be adorable and desirable. Incredible that neither Chip nor Dale was able to bust a nut there, but from being confused with an island goddess in one episode and being reason enough to stump your brain and leave you ogling at the same time, it shouldn't be that much of a surprise that this geeky cuty more than made the grade. Simply put, if Remy from Ratatouille got a whif of her, he'd be in heaven, because Gadget was definitely a dish in the cartoon universe.

46. Taarna - Heavy Metal

Hold it Xena, long before you were inspiring lesbo fantasies with Calisto, Taarna was one of the original warrior women. If you've watched Heavy Metal the film, you KNOW Taarna isn't the only beauty to grace that film, and certainly not the only one worthy to be on this list. But since she's on the cover of the movie and also the only one I was able to find completely clothed, she got the nod. Let's put it this way, beautiful white haired warrior woman in clothes more fit for an S & M bar riding a dragon bareback = holy mother of valkyries!!!

45. Princess Jasmine - Aladdin

Hot enough to have Aladdin constantly rub his magic lamp, Jasmine is Agrabah's version of Salma Hayek. Clever, spirited, strong willed, smart, and stubborn... yup definitely marriage material if I ever saw one. Truly one of the most beautiful Disney princesses and that hourglass figure just makes you beg for time to stand still.

44. Sakura - Street Fighter Series

As far as girl crushes go, Sakura takes it to another level by copying Ryu's every move and being more than willing to offer him an alternative to having to do uppercuts in a freezing waterfall. Simply put, Sakura is the schoolgirl everyone wants to bang with the skills to bust down on anyone who would dare touch her below the belt or beneath the bra. Tell me you wouldn't want to be in Ryu's shoes, I mean bare feet.

43. Kitana - Mortal Kombat

When it comes to drop dead gorgeous, Kitana ranks high simply because one kiss and you'll blow... the splatterhouse way. She's gorgeous and skilled and actually, she's the mega milf since she's over 10,000 years old. Then again, with that wealth of experience you can bet your ass she has tricks you haven't seen in any of the Mortal Kombat titles. Pass the fans a sec, it's getting hot in here.

42. Rayne - Blood Rayne series

how can you not love a women who sucks with such vigor and joy. Rayne is the vampire hottie that is all up for saving the world and feeding on more than a few bad guys along the way. If you check guy's psyches, more than half of them will have a vampire fetish and unlike the ones from the Queen of the Damned movie, Rayne sucks in the oh so good way. So leave your turtlenecks at home and tell her she can nibble just after you've had your fill. Fair is fair.

41. Jade - Beyond Good and Evil

Smart, fun, cool, deep, interesting, skilled, fascinating and she's good with a camera. Sure, you might end up dressed in fishnet stockings on the net, but wouldn't it be worth it just to touch the emerald beauty that is Jade. Jade is the perfect example that personality goes a hell of a long way when you want to interest a guy, because beyond good and evil, there's beautiful and such is Jade.

40. Felicia - Darkstalkers

I have so many pussy puns to say about felicia that I can't even choose one... not becuase I can't find the right one, but because Felicia is the type of Fighting game character that begs your attention. Between wanting to offer her some warm milk and wishing to see her give herself a bath, I don't know which thought better expresses the twelve year old in me that used to ogle in the character select screen until the machine chose the fighter for you. With looks like that, you can forgive the paws and the very possible addiction to catnip.


RestrictionsApply said...

I have a few of my own to add, but I'll wait until you're done so as to not have any repeats...

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