Feb 26, 2010

Five Really - REALLY - Bad Traits that Define: Me

Been a while since we've explored the finer five things in life, right? Well, the list of ideas keep on coming. This night, we're exploring our dark side. Yes. That place where we usually don't wanna go. The things that we really don't want to admit sometimes. The five worst traits that you have. Mine, I wear with pride. I have no qualms about telling the world how "low can I go". So, let's see what I can come up with without thinking and being extremely honest (isn't that the point of the series?):

Ladies and Ad men. In no particular order - because I couldn't place a number on them, the five Really Bad Traits that Define "Me":

1) I have a small amount of patience.
I give people two or three moments to annoy, anger, make an asshole of themselves or any other concept that they choose. But it is very short. It can average from 5 to 10 minutes. Then sarcasm comes pouring in me, and game over. Sorry. If it does't seem logic, have a strong argument or I just think I'm right, the patience will be gone in record time. I might kill you after my patience is gone. Ok. So maybe I don't actually kill you kill you. But in my mind, you're already Hannibal Lecter's appetizer, served by yours truly.

2) Don't get me angry. You wouldn't like me when I am angry.
I have been known to really lose it from time to time. As time and age have come by, I feel totally deserving to go really Medieval on someone's ass. I have stopped being scared about being and showing anger. Now... between you and me... I like how it feels. I release some extremely cool hormones in the process. The thing is, I always get angry 'cause I'm right. I can assure you, if I'm wrong, no point on being angry. Anger deserves well thought arguments. It is an art.

3) I strongly believe in vengeance.
This is kind of logical. Why? Let's put it this way. When you were a little kid, at some point you fought in school and got a black eye (yes, I sure did, and I'm a chick). Got home and what did your parents say? The next time someone hits you, you fight back. End of story.

4) I never give second opportunities.
Sad, right? Yeah. Fool me once, shame on you. Nope. You might think that for some people, the phrase ends on Fool me twice, shame on me. Fuck that shit. I just give you one opportunity, you screw it, I'm long gone. Sad thing is when I see people actually trying to make things work. While some people might think "jeez, that person is doing his/her best to win me over, I should give one more shot"... yada fucking yada.

5) While you are talking and arguing, I am already thinking ahead to many statements you will say and have the answer for all of them.
This is very hard to control, since it's in my nature. I'm sorry for that one. I'm such a control freak, I need to think like it's a chess game. While you are talking about moving a pawn, I already have my knight's horse is already fucking your bishop up the ass while the queen gave you the finger and is taping herself doing the nasty with some other king. This is the one bad trait that I wish I could stop doing, but honestly don't know how.

Jesus Christ. Um. Guys, this might look a tad bad but that's just because it's hard to see them all together. If you ask yourself this exact same question, and of course, answer honestly, you will get an awful list staring back at you. But you know what?

It was fun going there. Much love from the very honest Me.
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