May 3, 2011

5 Stupid things I have to have in my office: Me Edition.

It all started with the moment I went berzerk because I didn't have my Post its. I mean... come on! How can a human being work without those little yellow squared sticky papers from heaven? I stopped all that I was doing in search of them, to no avail. The horror: we're out of Post its. Lord in heaven, help me during my time of need. Life has no meaning... this has to get solved, asap.

Food for post. What simple, idiotic and mundane items you cannot live without at your office? What missing items make you lose your damn mind and make life a living hell? Come on, you know you have them. We all do. It's called Item OCD, and we all need certain things close by to know that the day will be easier.

Here is my list. 5 Items that make working bearable. Here... we... go!

1) Post its.
I need the normal square ones. No. Don't you dare come in with those tiny ones. I need the correct size or it won't be pleasurable. No, I don't need them big as hell also. I need them in the way god intended them to be. Squared, perfect. Color is no issue.

2) Gum.
All anxiety is lost when you unwrap a gummy, sticky little strip of cinnamon heaven. If it's able to make bubbles, count me in. No mint flavors please, it makes me go yuck.

3) Three Medium and two Big Ass Sharpies.
Not having them really makes me angry. In fact, in my office a certain someone usually "asks" for them for "just a second" and they go missing. I've had heated discussions about the fact that my Sharpies cannot leave my immediate sight unless someone is in danger. Lay off of my black delicious markers, dammit! Mine! MINE!

4) My Chronometer
Alas, a copywriter CANNOT live without a decent and most kick ass Chronometer. No, your computer clock does not work for timing your spots, trust me. You NEED a decent one that won't break if your Creative Director rams it up your butt for a bad radio copy. You need something durable. My recommendation is to go to any sports store and splurge on a good one. It will be with you almost forever, so don't be cheap.

5) A Wall Calendar
You will not believe this but I need to print it out and place it near my face or I will go nuts. A printed calendar helps you visualize and better manage your time. For all the advances in technology, this is where I draw the line. My calendar needs to have passed on some sort of print machine and has to be hanging near my body. I need to be able to see it, I need to be able to - in a second - tell clients when I am delivering their ads, how much time do I have to make them, etc.

Bonus and Honorable Mention: Beer.
If you are working late, your ad agency needs to make this bearable. I'm not talking about getting shitfaced, but I do think that working after 11pm deserves a cold one. So in my shop, we do have cold beers to be used late at night to make it easier to handle. Besides, after a few ones we've come up with some weird and cool concepts!

There it is. My list of Non-negociable items. Any of these go missing and you will have a very disturbed Me. Maybe I will not function very well, maybe I will just stop working, get on a car, get my stuff and come back.

Again. I'm serious. Don't touch my sharpies.

Much love, Me.


RestrictionsApply said...

- A mug full of cheap pens
- Post its
- Ottoman
- Magazines
- Action figures

Me said...


Tomorrow I'm headed to your office.

I gotta see that shit.

cheese said...

Post Its (Square... Indeed!!)

Sharpees (One New, Old Old)


Pantone Book

Water Bottle

Lucila said...

1. Some kind of chocolate
2. Music ON
3. Stylist and sharpened pencils
4. Cute toys
5. Book or Magazine (for when I go to the bathroom)

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