Sep 16, 2011

So I ate like a big fat AVPIG


If there’s anything I enjoy is going out with my wife, embarking on some good dining, maybe have a nice drink of wine or some other type of cocktail… but we’re prudent because it’s our money we’re spending and though we don’t cut corners, we also don’t overindulge so as to later be up debt creek without a paddle. A while back I was invited to a thank you dinner by some VP who made the collective lives of my team a pain in the ass. From asking for 30,000 revisions and having a prick attitude, to not even acknowledging our existence during the event, the guy went all out in his portrayal of Sir Dick of Doucheness.

So obviously, his way of making up is inviting us to dinner, and a couple of people on my team had the great idea of getting payback by ordering expensive things from the menu. Well the night didn’t exactly flow that way and pretty much no one ordered anything… not because the guy was a cheapskate, but because there was no need to do any more damage to his corporate credit card than what he was already doing. After all was said and done, 5 wine bottles had been consumed (ranging from $125-$300 a bottle), along with 3 full deserts (the equivalent of asking for an entire pie instead of a slice), three huge appetizers and enough meat to feed a the starting lineup of your favorite NFL team. The check was around the $1,800 mark… for 10 people.

I’m writing about this just to highlight the difference between lower echelon employees (AKA real people like the ones who read this blog) and VPs and AVPs (people who have no concept of money because unlike CEOs and Presidents, they won’t foot the bill). Normal employees look for bargain lunches and ways of cutting down costs while many VPs spend with reckless abandon. Everyone is saying that times are tough, money is tight and that tough decisions have to be made… That dinner proved that such a statement is utter bullshit. If VPs and higher ups didn’t live such lavish lifestyles, a lot of people, good people, wouldn’t need to be canned. But that’s not the case, because 99 out of 100 times, there is no such thing as a corporate family. There are just people who work to move the machine along so the rich can be fed.

It took me about two nights to make peace with what happened during that dinner, because it’s not like the perception of the VP changed or that he’ll be nicer the next time out. All that was proved is that anyone can spend money lavishly when it doesn’t come from their pocket and that if a few heads need to be chopped and eggs broken to preserve this lifestyle, so be it.

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