Mar 7, 2011

The Problems of the World are caused by advertising.

And I totally agree.

Dear Client: I'm Telling you for the last time

If only I had some balls and actually sent out the following, I'd be a happier person.

Dear (Insert Client here):

I assume that I haven't explained myself in a clear way, or maybe I'm talking Swahili when touching on this subject. For this, I apologize. I thought I was capable of expressing a decent sentence or two, but no worries, here I go again, explaining the wonderful world of documents that both you and I need to get our work done. But this time, I would like to make things easier for you, so I'll describe each one in a very simple way. Hope by the end of this you actually understand a word I wrote.

1) Please send all logos in vector files or photoshop high resolution.
Wait! Of course, you have worked years at this and for some reason, no one has fully explained the difference between a vector file and a photoshop file. Let me see if I can help you out! A vector is like a superhuman penis: you can deliver it small but it can grow as long as you want and as huge as you desire, with no limits. That, dear client, is pleasure. All creatives want that superhuman penis file over any other format. Give it to them.

A photoshop logo, first of all, is a freak of nature. But we accept them anyway. Now, also like a penis, you need to make sure it's big enough to do the work. No small file works because, at the end, it just looks awful and doesn't feel right. You see it and you don't like it. So remember, in photoshop, think shlonger. Huge big shlonger.

2) Microsoft word was invented mainly for writing. Don't send a logo placed in a page, please.
Do your pizza man send you your cheese and pepperoni in a shoe box just because it fits? No, right? Then please for the love of Ogilvy, don't think that a Word document is the right vessel. And besides, you should know better than that.

3) If I send you a screenshot to approve the artwork, that doesn't mean that I'm sending you the final artwork. Please, don't send it to the printers.
I'm trying to make your life easier. So please, just approve the artwork and wait for the final artwork to arrive. Just because you love what you see in your email doesn't mean it's ok to get printed.

4) No, you cannot revise artworks in your Word or Powerpoint.
Maybe you can buy all the programs I own and then revise the artwork yourself! All advertising people know that EVERYBODY can design and be a copywriter! Like I can be a surgeon if I just pick up a knife and some rubbing alcohol!

Now... let's talk one more important thing. In fact, this is the reason I wrote this post - again. Let me see if I can put this nicely...

Why am I telling you this again? Honestly! You are in some sort of marketing/advertising position at your company, right? Then YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS! You SHOULD be able to at least know when a logo is delivered in the correct form! You SHOULD know the difference between a JPG and a PDF! You SHOULD know when a photo is way too low resolution to be used in any type of artwork! YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS!

Ok so let's argue the fact that you have not worked in advertising, at least not in production. Ok, I'll give you that. But... after years of me asking for the logo in all the descriptions I've listed above... I'd guess you would learn! I mean, if I keep talking about vectors, high resolution, pdf's... repetition SHOULD do the work!

Sad thing is... I have no hope that I will stop writing this post in a couple of years. Might as well learn to deal with it.

2010 in Music - The Social Network Soundtrack – Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross - A


As the silent correspondent for WAS known as Travisfkr recently told me, if Trent Reznor wins an Oscar for his work on the Social Network soundtrack, it’s a testament to the value of 90’s music and Generation X. The fact of the matter is that for the better part of the decade, maestro Reznor became quite friendly with Atticus Ross and together, they have crafted some of the most consistent NIN music ever, and they’re not letting up.

For this soundtrack imagine the Ghosts compilation from NIN but with the severe focus of the Fragile. That’s what this soundtrack is, ghostly, electro-organic, and brooding, but also precise to a T. It’s also quite a testament to the skills that have been honed to near perfection over the career of Reznor. Every note is meticulously placed and deliberate for the sake of creating something grand and the entire album unfolds wonderfully. Whereas other NIN nails focused on musical juxtapositions, here the music is more natural in how things are pieced together, or maybe we’re just familiar with previous musical exploits.

The point is that if you want a Score that is dark, creepy, brooding, ghostly and the perfect music to sleep to if you’re a fan of HP Lovecraft or Stephen King, look no further and enjoy the nightmares. :)

Highlight Tracks: The complete album

Nerds on a Subway.

The Mp3 Experiment Six

Mar 6, 2011

National Geographic is awesome: Are You Typical?

2010 in Music - Ray Lamontagne – God Willing and the Creek Don’t Rise B+


With every subsequent album, I’m further convinced that Ray Lamontagne is actually a guy who time travelled from the 60’s and decided to become a recording artist in the 21st century. The guy’s voice has enough soul to sound like a relative of Joe Cocker, though not as anguished or powerful. So in comes the 4th installment of Mr. Lamontagne with “Repo Man” and immediately you get a funky soul R & B feeling that sounds better suited to 50 years in the past, but it still works to get your groove on. Then the second track, “New York City’s Killing Me” throws a left curve, including a beautiful slide guitar segment that’s just pure honey to your ears. It’s a country soaked ballad about how a big city kills a good old boy from the country. But when the third track “God Willin & the Creek Don’t Rise” comes around, it’s so dense and moody that you can’t help but let the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. To be honest, it might be one of Lamontagne’s best songs, up there with “Be Here Now” and “Trouble”. Afterwards, you have “Beg Steal or Borrow” which is a midtempo country road trip song and though it’s good, it isn’t stellar. The album has a one two love song duo starting with a sparsely arranged “Are we really through” a really beautiful song that either sounds like a Ray demo, or a song some unknown ultra talented musician would sing under a tree. Next up comes “This Love is Over”, a great song with lots of musical colors thrown into the mix without anything becoming overpowering. From piano, to strings and the lap steel guitars that appear on most of the album, to the weary rasp of Lamontagne’s voice, it’s one of the better tracks on the album and shows what he can do when he hits his stride. Which isn’t to say that this is his best album. To be honest, it isn’t his best album, far from it actually because although the country flavor adds a new dimension, the overall consistency in his previous 3 albums isn’t there. The first song sounds out of place and though it’s really great and one of the top tracks on the setlist, it’s not like there’s any real ebb and flow to the album. Regardless, for not having the flow of a classic, this album still delivers plenty to enjoy.

Highlight Tracks: Repo Man, New York City’s Killing Me, God Willin’& The Creek Don’t Rise, Devil’s in the Jukebox

Mar 4, 2011

"The The Impotence of Proofreading"

Howard Stern is still the man.



Fortune Cookie 500#'s 450-454

On mediocrity
Being under par should never be par for the course.

On alcohol
The more satisfied one is with life, the less they need liquid satisfaction.

On the word rush
Never rush to do everything rushed.

On the word rush pt 2.
There is a serious addiction to the word rush.

On priorities
There is a serious social problem with priorities and a large portion begin at the workplace.

Pearl Jam – Live on Ten Legs - A-




Let’s get things straight, I’m a Pearl Jam mark so if you’re looking for something bad to be said about a Pearl Jam release, look elsewhere. The only time I’m ever going to say anything remotely negative is that I really think they didn’t go to the next level with their Storytellers performance on VH1, and that was kind of a bummer for me. Apart from that, no complaints to share.

That being said, this year has a couple of Pearl Jam releases starting off with Live on Ten Legs. If you like live albums, you won’t be disappointed because they show why they’re one of the top ten bands you should see before you die, period. Every track kicks in the gut and if you’ve gone to a Pearl Jam concert, you know the energy these guys play with.

The first track is a Joe Strummer cover and it kicks serious ass. If you’re a Pearl Jam mark, every single new track or cover you come along means that you’ll smile at your band doing the original proud. Highlights in this track go to Mike McCready’s riff and the excellent rhythm section of maestros Cameron and Ament. Without missing a beat, in flows World Wide Suicide, punchier than the album version. The punches don’t stop and one of the true highlights in the album is the live version of Got Some. Matt Cameron shows why he’s one of the best drummers in rock and roll and the track just begs you to want to jump around. The impressive thing is that even on this song, the live version has more energy than the recorded version, and that’s saying something.

The set continues with State of Love and Trust and there’s a reason why this is a fan favorite, just listen. Then you have I am Mine which is the best drinking song Pearl Jam has ever written (a personal take obviously since the lyrics have NOTHING to do with drinking). Afterwards, another track from the last album comes into the setlist in Unthought Known, a track that grows and grows until becoming an optimistic behemoth to further facilitate the communion of Pearl Jam fans. Following is another true highlight in this fantastic set, a version of Rearviewmirror with a musical breakdown that starts near the two minute mark with an improvised chant, drumming licks, great bass lines and a three guitar attack that has to be among their finest live highlights. Then you have a great rendition of The Fixer (one of the few instances where I think the recorded version has more energy than the live version), but is no less impressive.

Then you have Mike McCready tear the solos from Nothing as It Seems (3 total), reminding you that Binaural is one of those PJ albums that some people overlooked, but that they shouldn’t have. Afterwards comes one of my fav tracks off Yield, In Hiding in a great rendition that truly showcases how uplifting this band can be on some of their best tracks. Once that gem including some crowd participation ends, in comes Just Breathe, a beautiful song off the new album that shows Eddie Vedder traversing terrain more akin to his solo outing for the Into the Wild soundtrack, backed up by his band friends and a string section to take the song to the next level.

Then their biggest hit comes into the setlist, a song that has been largely absent from major live releases up until the Gorge Boxset. Jeremy still soars and shows that this band has gone their own route from the getgo. And then, in typical Pearl Jam fashion, they follow up their greatest hit with an obscure track from PiD titled Public Image followed up by a blistering rendition of Spin the Black Circle and the ever live classic of Porch. Simply put, if you’ve never heard Porch live, you’re missing out BIG TIME. Pretty much everyone goes crazy and push the frenzy way beyond the limit. To close the set, two absolute gems grace Live on Ten Legs, The epic Alive and one of their best closers, Yellow Ledbetter.

Yet again, Pearl Jam proves that they have more muscle in their metaphorical music pinky than most bands have in a career and that the spirit of The Who still lives strong in one of the greatest American Bands ever to explode onstage.

Mar 3, 2011

Fortune Cookie 500#'s 446-450

On working on the weekend
At least prisoners get 3 meals a day when they serve their time.

On extra hours
I wish I could at least discount the extra hours I’ve worked from my Tax Form.

On eating pizza
Baked dough, tomato sauce and cheese does not a happy creative make.

On pain
Your body is wiser than your work ethic.

On patience
Measuring with your morals is the quickest way to lose your cool.

2010 in Music - Circa Survive – Blue Sky Noise – A-




If you’ve listened to Circa Survive and you didn’t like it before, odds are that you won’t change your opinion. However, if you enjoyed Juturna and On Letting Go, then great news because Blue Sky Noise takes what worked best in those efforts and takes it to the next level. To be honest, to me On Letting Go felt like a step sideways, consolidating talents but not necessarily presenting anything better than the debut. That is not the case in their third full length album. The music is tighter, the writing is better and there’s more hooks on this album than a meat plant. I’m pretty sure the polarizing factor in whether you like this band or not is on Anthony Green’s voice, because musically I only have good things to say about their progress as a band. His voice however might annoy a couple of people. I don’t mind it but I’ve shown a taste for high pitched musicians, Rush, Deadletter Circus and Mars Volta to name but a few. The only other thing that people might have a beef is the occasional child choir offering backup vocals on tracks like Glass Arrows and Dyed in the Wool, but I sincerely think it worked. But, if anything, Circa Survive truly proves that being a Hot Topic local doesn’t mean you have to listen to crappy bands.

Highlight Tracks: Strange Terrain - Get Out - Imaginary Enemy - Frozen Creek - Spirit of the Stairwell - Dyed in the Wool

Mar 2, 2011

2010 in Music - Dead Letter Circus – This is the Warning - A




I first heard Dead Letter Circus on surfline.com as a track for a segment. I was immediately intrigued by the band, found out they’re from Australia and decided to follow them closely. What’s transpired is that I’ve ordered an EP, a single and an album from Australia because if you like fast quasi prog music, with enough bite to show that they’re a rock band through and through, then you might want to check them out. The single and EP are great on their own and truly offer almost enough material for an album (7 tracks in total). But last year was when they finally released This is the Warning, a unique album that truly demonstrates that these guys are in it to make music that’s all their own. The production is actually quite stellar and I’m not exaggerating when I say this is the best Australian band I’ve heard since Silverhciar although it’s a completely different musical context. The album opens up with “Here we Divide”, a statement track that defines their style in regards to swirling guitars, thundering drums, time shifts and music that makes you think you’re taking part in some space travel. Btw, the drumming in the entire album is extremely solid. “One Step” follows the same mood set in the first track with whirling musical dynamics and layer upon layer of effects laden guitars. “Big” is another song that sounds like the first two tracks and as the name implies, BIG. “The Space on the Wall” does nothing to reduce the scope of the music and truly, it’s like they’re playing to a space armada at times. Further on in the album comes “Reaction” another thundering track that grows into a huge song by the time it hits the chorus. Afterwards you have what I consider the highlight of the album “The Drum”. The sheer scope of the intro to this track is amazing, and the entire song is a buildup to the last minute of the song which has everyone going ballistic in their respective instruments with a sonic explosion that eases into “The Design”, a track some people might not like because it’s slow in comparison, but maybe the break needed after the previous track. “Next in Line” brings it all back though and thunders enough delay effect guitars to make you forget about the previous track.

Highlight Tracks: The Drum, This is the Warning, Reaction, Big, The Space on the Wall

Pencil vs. Camera



Via Ben Heine's Flickr Photostream. Click at the name of the post for his work.

Mar 1, 2011

You really should follow us at Twitter...

Don't have time to go back in time to all our wonderful posts since 2005? No problem my friend. During the week I post our favorite and most ugly rants for you to enjoy. Just add us to your twitter feed and I'll do the rest.

So there you go, start adding, my tweeps. You'll like what you see. And if you want to recommend us to your friends, by all means do so. We're looking to add more people to our blog and we need your help! We want to see if we can someday do the WAS book we've always wanted to do!

Much love. Me.

Charlie Sheen has Tiger Blood

Tv spot alert! Das Beer Boot.

2010 in Music - Minus the bear – Omni - A



Minus the Bear has always played to the beat of their own drum. In an age of countless clones looking to emulate whatever is making the big bucks, MTB push forth in their own particular direction to bring you a new collection of tracks that are equal parts groovy. Maybe it was the video, but seriously “My Time” sounds like a great track to dance to. Unlike their prior release that had them swinging for the space time continuum fences, here they’ve firmly established that they want you to bob your head in agreement with their awesomeness. Great musicianship throughout and I honestly don’t care what most publications wrote about the album, I think it’s a hell of a solid album. After the leadoff single, they flow into “Summer Angel”, another quirky and very MTB like song. But part of the highlight in this album is the sheer attention to make every single track work on its own while flowing seamlessly from one track into another. Truth be told, if you listen to individual tracks, you’ll be satisfied, but when you hear it from start to finish you realize how good the album is and in a time where making full blown albums and thinking of track listing is quickly becoming an extinct practice, at least for my part I appreciate the effort. Third up on the ten track special is “Secret Country” a song that continues the motif of quasi danceable numbers with great music and catchy hooks. The following couple of tracks are just as solid but a real gem is the one two punch of “Into the Mirror” and “Animal Backwards” which flow into each other with such perfect precision that you can’t help but want to listen to them live to see the segue. Actually you can even imagine it on the dance floor. Yet again it feels as if some of these songs are meant to be danced more than just listened to, and that’s just fine with me. After another great track, the album ends on a great note with the relaxed and spacey “Fooled by the Night”, which takes two and half minutes to truly start and delights you with 5 more minutes of joy, just so you’re left with the itch to hit play again.

Highlight Tracks: My Time, Summer Angel, Secret Country, Into the Mirror, Animal Backwards, Fooled by the Night

The Death Star: it darth rules.

Star Wars Death Star
Compiled by Car Insurance Guide and Geeks are Sexy | Picture hosted on imgur

Five horrible moments that define my Ad Life: Me edition.

This month it seems like the theme is going back in time and remembering. First, it was our first year. Second, Dear Brook asks us what we think about our work... Then, I stumble upon Lemonade and it took me back to all those times that I've talked about retiring from this crap (honest to God, had lunch with RestrictionsApply today and we started yapping about opening some hot dog stand instead of working on one more ad)... and then it hits me.

I've never written about how really bad it has been. And I mean... bad. Really bad. And no, we're not on a rampage about negativity. In fact, I think we're exploring the reality of this business. This blog started in 2005 and still we can find things that bug or piss us off. But I think we've never done this: go into the really dark place and go back and remember what happened.

I'm doing it tonight. God I hope I can go to sleep afterwards and not have nightmares. In no particular order, five horrible moments in my Ad Life.

• The time that I had a nervous meltdown.
This is the only one I truly remember because it taught me a lot about myself and how much I can tolerate just before I just unravel. I never noticed that I was that nervous or that I was overworked. I was just walking at my agency and suddenly I felt it: my brain was trembling, sort of. It was like someone had hit me with something hard and my head felt like a bell that would not stop ringing. I felt horrible, it never went away. I had scans, I went to the hospital for many days. No doctor had an idea of what could possibly be the cause of my illness. One doctor gave me Xanax to calm me down, but just because not knowing was making me nervous... and suddenly it went away. It was so much stress my body was shutting down and the only way I felt better was by relaxing myself with medications. Oh yes, one day ask your Human Resources person on what doctor and medication your agency covers most at your agency: psychologists and anti-depressants.

• The time that I grabbed my bag and walked up Human Resources to quit on the spot.
That was a sad day because I really did not want to be there anymore. I felt horrible. I felt like in a cage, like in prison. I hated going to work. I even hated dressing up in the morning to go to work because I really despised being inside the building. My HR person told me that if I left, I would give up some of my rights (money) and with tears in my eyes I sat down and kept working. The thing is that everyone does it at some point at their careers.

• The Saturday I was taking a shower and started crying, never stopped until I drove up to the office - after working for a month and a half non-stop.
Desperation is not a word that can describe this. You feel like it's never going to end, like you are working just for the exercise of doing it. Like you're practicing advertising or something. We worked NON STOP for a month and a half. No weekends, no nights. I mean all day and all night, usually until 11-1am. Horrible. Horrible...

• The time I had to go to a film shoot after a night fighting with my ex-husband and only one hour of sleep. Oh and it was a weekend.
That's the thing about our work. Sometimes you just have to go on because, well, the spot airs on a Monday. Sorry. Sorry if you have personal problems that you SHOULD be working on, specially if it's a weekend. Nope. The spot needs to be done, and you need to suck up your personal problems and deal with it. I stopped counting the times I had personal problems that I didn't have time to sort out because of a shit ad. Now... you see?? This makes me angry. I was young and stupid. This should not have happened. Ever.

• The time I saw my friends get fired or that I learned that they were.
It's the sort of experience you never want to remember because it's very visceral. And by that, I mean that you usually get pains and want to throw up. You feel very weird. You feel guilty if you stayed. You feel even worse if you were recently hired but survived the slashings. You feel worried about them, you feel desperate to try to help. The most disturbing thing you will ever see - and it WILL happen - is seeing this. Now, get ready to watch a day when 10, 20 people get fired the same day. Yes. There is nothing more disturbing than seeing it and wondering if you will be next... or your friends.

I can add a couple more but that would not even compare to the previous five. I do this because; 1) it's nice to go back to see what happened and if I learned anything, 2) young people out there REALLY need to know that the bullshit that colleges promise is just stories. It gets bad. In fact, I can go back to last November when I cried until I couldn't no more, because I was overworked - AND I HAVE MY OWN BUSINESS. Yes, I overworked MYSELF.

Learn people, learn. It's not so pretty sometimes.
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