Apr 3, 2012

Oh Me so Horny, Me Advertise you long time.

For as long as man has had history to report, there have been hookers. Prostitutes, to say it correctly. If we research the term, we can find a shitload of definitions, but if we sum it up, it's simple: a person does some kind of sexual thing in exchange for money. Put your seatbelts on, this is going to get interesting...

So! There you are, showing your best at your corner. You are the Greatest Ho of all time. You sucky sucky beyond belief, and more importantly, you are bendy in any shape possible. You hit the gym, so your endurance is out of this world. You're hot, you got your freak talents on, you are clean from any bugs. You are the star of the night. You got your tall as shit shoes or your tightest leather pants (hey, men can hook too, dammit). All you have to do is walk it, baby. You will get noticed. Let's get ready to rumble!

Now... in comes walking your competition. While they might look ok and decent to screw, you just know you have that extra talent. Maybe she or he gets tired after 10 minutes, but not you, man. You have the experience. You've been places, you've learned some weird Kamasutra things that no one can understand. So what if this asshole is near your corner, right? People will sure learn the difference and pick YOU as the best of them all...

Here comes the thing. You charge 50 bucks for some booty action, they charge 35. And they don't even cuddle at the end, you know? They are breaking the market! How the hell can they do that? Don't they know that they are giving away their shit and making YOU look bad? 100 for a BJ? Come on!!! That requires time and energy, man! You cannot charge less than that if you want that! What was the line? "They don't call it a job for nothing!" So true...

Maybe now you get the point. We need to stop advertising prostitutes of charging crap for their artwork. Why? Because creativity HAS a price. We cannot undersell our work, no matter if we are doing a full page ad or licking some disgusting ballsacks, dammit! It's the same shit, you're kissing some ass to get the job ended, for Pete's sake! If you charge 400 bucks for a print ad, or 75 bucks for a logo, then you are the hooker at the corner making us high price escorts look bad. And yes, you can eat a Whopper when you end your shift, but guess what, Pretty Woman, some of us hooking here have a shitload of mouths to feed, and we cannot do it on your price for your services.

Oh but that's just the clients that I get at my corner, you might say. Bullshit. You are offering your shit way too cheap, and of course they will say yes. At the end, they come first, pun intended. You are left there to clean up and move along to another client that will not respect you in any shape or form. Besides, what do you really want? Do you want a low life client who will just lay there or do you want a nice decent person who will maybe tip you a little extra and take you to dinner afterwards. Maybe he has friends... yeah... friends with money like he has... and he spreads the word around... and suddenly you get to have afluent clients... like golfers, you know?

You choose your path, but let me tell you, if you charge less for cretivity because "it's your angle"... you are screwing yourself and all the rest of us at our corner.

Me love you long time.

5 comments:

Rick Lipsett said...

Wow. I guess I'm living a paradox right now. I believe in every work you wrote here. I've even said the exact same thing you are saying now. Problem is, on my end things are not looking good money-wise so what did I do? I crossed to the dark side. I offered some discounts good for a limited time.

I just hope when the time passes, I can do a Darth Vader and return to the Light Side of the Force.

Great Post. Rubbed a little reality to my face. Needed it, although I also need cash. BTW, did you write this because of me? Felt like it.

Much love!

Me said...

Hey there Rick. No, there is no inspiration from any of our fans (how could I know where you work or what you charge??).

This post has been a topic that we've touched before here as WAS, but recently I had to quote some projects and landed in the dilemma of not quoting too high or too low a project in fear of losing the work... we ended up sticking to our guns and saying a price that is worth our job and experience. We decided not to hook, I guess. Hence the post.

Maybe I touched a nerve, sorry about that, it happens quite a lot here.

Much love, Me.

Rick Lipsett said...

Must've been my guilty conciense getting the best of me. as I pressed send on the email newsletter My brain was screaming NOOOO, but my pockets took a hold of my hands, and... there you go.

But I appreciated the post. It was like a splash of freezer cooled water over the shower curtain, when taking a hot shower.

Keep 'em coming!

Me said...

Yikes. So sorry! I sure know how that feels, because I've gone that route before, only not to enjoy what I've seen happen to me or my friends. I just think we deserve what we ask for... remember my claim of doctors and lawyers, you would never think of telling them to charge less... why should your clients ask you that? Food for thought.

Thank you for writing and keep yo'head up.

Osama Zain said...

Good another post :)
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