Mr. Client this is Mr. Paperweight, Mr. Paperweight... just sit there

With every meeting one goes to, there's always something new to find in regards to the people that are at the table making decisions or at least looking as if they are doing something remotely important apart from debuting their new gold cock cufflinks. There's the makers, the breakers, the despots, the assholes, the douche bags, the numnuts and if you hadn't noticed an additional member at the table, that's perfectly fine because you overlooked what is known as the Paperweight.

If you're not sure which person I'm referring to, please look over every person at the table and the one you'd vote most likely to be an animatronic is what I'm referring to. That's right, the person that always says the same things when they first see each other at a meeting, offer no opinion or anything resembling constructive anything and look two steps away from malfunctioning... especially if they asked a question.



The reality of the matter is that these people are in their positions due to inertia more than anything really. They are simply unwilling to move unless forcefully pink slipped and terminated. They sit at the table, smile on cue, look introspective on cue and pretty much do anything on cue since they're obviously catering to someone who swears they're useful for something if only to scream at, bitch, blame etc... much like a variety of shitty dog owners who have a canine that no matter how hard it's beaten, it still wags it's tail.

So what to do with these people? Absolutely nothing. I'm serious, don't waste your time because they're on autopilot and it's doubtful they're recording any of the experiences that are passing in front of them. It's almost like an animate coma where the person doesn't realize they're in a coma, they just wake up brain dead, eat breakfast, make as if they read the newspaper and masterfully fool society into thinking that there's even one alpha wave tangling around in their noggin.

So if someone seems like they're a genuine waste of space, feel free to walk up to them with a large stack of papers, ask them to stand, put them on their chair and leave.

cheers