Jan 8, 2010

5 Worst Fonts of All Time, according to Me.

Since this week has been "greatest of all times" galore, let's go the other route, shall we? Each day we have to endure opening our set of fonts, yada yada yada. But when we open our Illustrator (are you STILL using Freehand? YUCK!), there are some black sheep that we would never, ever use. You know the ones. The really ugly ones. Those fonts that under no circumstance you would ever use. Even for an invitation for someone you really hate.

Well, let me see what happens when I load the program and choose the five fonts someone would have to kill me to use. If you want to join in the fun, don't cheat. It's the default font list that we all get when we load the program, ok? Mac Users as well, dammit. You PC people... go away!

1) Papyrus. The fact that James Cameron used it, not only for the name of his movie Avatar but also for the subtitles is just an act of Satan. That was the only thing of the movie I didn't like. Shit font.


2) Comic Sans. Not even for my first kid's birthday would I use this crap. If I were a comic artist, I would be extremely pissed off that this font is referred in some way to comic books. Vomit.


3) Braggadocio. This is my joke font. Oh. Haven't told you? I have a secret wish that one day some crappy client comes along and I hate them so much I use this piece of turd in one of their ads. They love it, and I am laughing secretly at them. Evil plan. Someday... someday...


4) Tekton Pro. Oh! I'm an architect! From the 70's! My handwriting is so awesome, it can make you crap instantly! The pain. The pain. Why is this available still and doesn't just go away?


5) Mistral. There is NO reason why you should use this font, ever. It is an abomination. They "tried" to do retro and ended up with typographic diarrhea.


So there you are. My five type enemies of all time. Which are yours?
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