10. Curious George
Though it could be debated over if George got to see the Man in the Yellow Hat banging a series of Nevada Hookers, my infant nostalgia couldn’t help but actually smile at him making a come back. Call me silly, sentimental, stupid or whatnot, but I’d choose the monkey over a fucking Tele Tuby ANY day of the fucking week.
9. Weird Al Yankovic
Seems every time Weird al comes out with a new album, people call it a come back when in reality he has always been around. He’s put on the list just for the fact that people have a short attention span and don’t realize he’s never away for more than 3 years.
8. Oleg Maskaev- Shannon Briggs
If you saw the Rahman-Maskaev or Briggs-Liakhovich boxing bouts, you were treated to lackluster bouts until the last two rounds where both Briggs and Maskaev knocked out their opponents because the other guys fucked up. Maskaev got dominated early, gained momentum and ultimately knocked Rahman out thanks mainly to the efforts in rounds 11 and 12 and Briggs sucked during his whole match until he landed about four thudding blows to send an opponent crashing onto the floor… that’s the arena floor since he knocked Laikhovic out of the ring, an opponent who’d schooled him in a sucky match. Not a thing of beauty, but noteworthy to see these guys putting the effort in so late in the match. Now if they could do it earlier….
7. Andy Irons
Ok, I’m not an Andy Irons fan. I think he’s a hell of a surfer but I also think he comes off as a dick more often than naught. Be it real or not, maybe in essence he’s a cool guy, but he’s been portrayed as the villain against Kelly Slater and like another of the sheep, I’ve gobbled it up because he’s given enough reason for people to think he’s a whiny bitch, a sore loser and a guy you can easily love to hate. That being said, his performance this year in the Pipe Championship showed the guy is a hell of a surfer, an intense competitor and the only person that can defeat Kelly Slater decisively. Kudos. I look forward to this year’s tour and your continued rivalry with Kelly. After all, what would an Ali be without a Frazier.
6. James Bond
I confess I didn’t see the movie, but this was touted as a hell of a comeback for the man who now doesn’t give a flying fuck if it’s shaken or stirred. It was also decidedly the largest amount of female underwear ever to spontaneously combust during showings of a movie.
5. Darren Aronofsky
Three movies to his name and mixed reviews galore for his last endeavor. I don’t care what most people said; I loved The Fountain and am convinced it’s one of the best scores I’ve heard in a long time. I call this a comeback because Aronofsky showed what a real high quality human being does when they face adversity, they don’t call it quits on their visions or dreams. They don’t accept defeat. They stick through and follow their gut for however much blasting they get from people. Overrated? Some might say. But I can’t help but not care about popular belief and focus on how much I like his work.
4. Pearl Jam
It's a bird, it's plane, it's an Avocado? Yes my friends. It's Pearl Jam. They never left, but a lot of people did walk out on PJ. I’ve bought all their albums, seen them live three times and give my humblest thanks as a fan. Prior to ‘06’s self titled avocado extravaganza, they’d put out two records most people were scratching their heads at, but with ‘Pearl Jam’, the band showed that being over 40 only means that their balls are a bit more musky but that they can shred fifty times harder than bands half their age. Story of the Year, My Chemical Romance, Sum 41, Angels and Airwaves… all feel free to commit suicide.
3. Eddie Murphy
Whoever thought he could recover from The Haunted Mansion and the Adventures of Pluto Nash? I didn’t; and he’s proved many wrong thanks to an intense performance in Dreamgirls that has Oscar buzz written all over it and the trailer for his upcoming comedy Norbit. Is he back? Yes for now. Let’s just hope he can give Steve Martin a few pointers on what the fuck to do with his career. Too hot for the hot tub? Let's frigging hope so.
2. Rocky
Being a child of the 80’s, I grew up with Rocky III and IV. I suffered the loss of Apollo and roared at the knockout of Mr. T. I also wept after seeing Rocky V and how much it sucked (in large part due to Tommy Gunn and the anticlimactic street fight). Rocky Balboa reminded me why I loved Rocky so much. Thanks Rocko. I hope I’m able to do as you and always get up no matter how bad my ass gets whooped.
1. Nintendo
People have counted the big N out ever since N64. They’ve offered seventy thousand game boy versions and the ho-hum (actually quite decent) Game Cube. But with the Nintendo DS and the Nintendo Wii… EVERYONE is peeing their pants, either from joy or fear. Over 3,000,000 units sold worldwide for the Wii. Wii would definitely like to play. Nuff said.
NOTABLE MENTION:
The Colts
I know it was in ’07 but if you’re a football fan AND a Colts fan, you STILL have a hardon from two weeks ago's Colts VS New England game. Overcoming a 21-3 deficit to slam NE in the ass and go to the Super Bowl. Mad props to the Colts but one thing…. I’m still rooting for DA BEARSSSSSS. Long live DITKAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
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